Resources, research, and realizations

Today was a bombardment of research and resources.

Finally.

I'm realizing that it's a question of lacking time. And not taking the time. I jumped into the villages without entirely knowing what I was doing. Which, really, was fine. For probably the first 2 or 3 weeks. By weeks four and 5, though, I should have stepped out a bit perhaps. Taken a bit of a break. Sought after resources from staff and direction from supervisors.

This week has (finally) been a time for that, and I feel like it's been an especially fruitful day.

I worked from about 9 till 7, mostly just reading resources that I requested and were sent to me from WV staff and a few other people back home.

I would have really have liked to have found a lot of these on my own (perhaps I should have), but frankly, the vast majority of them are science journals the University of Guelph does not allow me to access via online portals even though I'm alumni, and the rest are internal World Vision documents that I never got to asking for. Never knew what to ask for.

But, and the thought occurred to me earlier today, I realize that I only had the 1st week back to figure out the schedule of village visits, and then the past 4 weeks have basically been in the villages. So, when have I really had the time to look into a lot of this stuff? Sure, it would have been nice to have worked on a bunch of this stuff during the first 4 1/2 weeks of work here the first time round. But you know, I looked at my journal the other day that explained those first four weeks, and I was all over the place, between Dakar, Fatick, a number of the ADPs, take a look at this project here, that one there. And then weeks were broken up, a few weeks to transition, then pratically Christmas holidays. And then 1 1/2 weeks back. And then I got sick... It really seems like things were hampered down at the start.

So, while it sounds like I'm giving excuses, really, I'm just trying to come to terms with where I currently stand, and then, knowing that, where to go. Certainly, this week will be a week of reading, research, and discussion with a few helpful staff. I also have to think about the workshops I'm doing at the end of September, and also whether I can, and to what extent and how I might need to change some of my approach to my work. Juggling time in the villages and time out is proving to be a bit tricky. The research, I feel, affects my awareness of what to search for in the villages. The village visits shed light on local perceptions and behaviours. So, I'd like to do the research before the villages. Except, what village do I cut out if I need more time than the 5 days I have slotted for the start of August? How useful is research I do after the village visits?

Put it this way, you're probably not at all interested in my own thought process, so I'll stop that for the moment. But, while it's confusing and all over the place, I'm very thankful to at least have a few things to think about and work towards.
. . .

I finally decided to stop and talk with a few of the guys in the city on my way home from work today. I finally had time in the evening on a week day to do that. (it's been my first full week back in the city since I started going to the villages. I always forget that). It was interesting hearing a bit about their lives; I was glad for the discussion.
. . .
I've finally been able to hang out with my housemates. Usually, I'm gone when they're there, and they're gone when I'm there. I've only realized now how much that sucks, because I really lose out on being able to get to know them. And these people know their culture. So I also miss out on getting to know their culture (because they can speak French, unlike those in the villages who can't . . . ).

Language has proven to be a really large barrier to the free flow of my research. In Thiouthioune, I had the best experience, if only for the most pratical reason that the village chief there (El Hadj Michel Dieng) speaks French. Pure and simple. And so the evenings, and the casual talk, aren't lost. I don't have to fight to understand just the barest of information.
. . .

Anyways, as an answer to prayer, I'm still alive. And I'm starting to refocus. God knew I needed the break, and I'm glad I followed my thought to bow out of the village this week. Now I'm off to home to hang out with an American friend. I'm going to drink wine and watch a movie, and then wake up and look forward (with actually a whole lot of interest) to the work I must do and the piles of information that I now have to read through!
. . .

Thanks for your prayers.
I want July 16 and 17 to be a turning point for me in the internship. It is my prayer that this be so.